The Discipline of Transcendence, Vol 1
Discourses on the 42 Sutras of Buddha
The nurse came in with a tape measure. The patient remained silent and unprotesting as the nurse measured him from head to toe and from shoulder to shoulder, but could contain himself no longer when she measured the distance from the mattress on the bed to the height of his rather large stomach.
‘What on earth are you doing, nurse?’ he asked weakly.
‘I am measuring you for a coffin,’ was the unexpected reply.
‘But I am not dead!’
‘Be quiet! Do you want to make a fool out of the doctor?’
Now, the doctor says, and he knows better whether you are dead or alive. ‘Be quiet!’ she says. ‘Do you want to make a fool out of the doctor?’
Whatsoever you do, you will be wrong, because you will be going against somebody’s wishes, somebody’s ideas.
It is very difficult to please all, and if you go on trying to please.all you will be simply wasting your life. And nobody is pleased, nobody can be pleased, it is impossible to please anybody.
Stop fulfilling expectations of others, because that is the only way you can commit suicide.
You are not here to fulfill anybody’s expectations and nobody else is here to fulfill your expectations. Never become a victim of others’ expectations and don’t make anybody a victim of your expectations.
This is what I call individuality.
Respect your own individuality and respect others’ individuality.
Never interfere in anybody’s life and don’t allow anybody to interfere in your life. Only then one day you can grow into spirituality.
Otherwise, ninety-nine percent of people simply commit suicide. Their whole life is nothing but a slow suicide.
Fulfilling this expectation, that expectation… some day it was the father, some day it was the mother, some day it was the wife, husband, then come children — they also expect. You have to fulfill their expectations.
Then the society, the priest and the politician, and all around everybody is expecting. And poor you there, just a poor human being — and the whole world expecting you to do this and that. And if you don’t fulfill their expectations… and you can’t fulfill all of their expectations, because they are contradictory.
You have gone mad fulfilling everybody’s expectations.
And you have not fulfilled anybody’s; nobody is happy. This is the beauty. You are lost, completely destroyed, and nobody is happy.
Because people who are not happy with themselves cannot be happy in any way. Whatsoever you do, they will find ways to be unhappy with you, because they cannot be happy.
Happiness is an art that one has to learn. It has nothing to do with your doing or not doing.